Memories of MK Ultra: A Journey of Discovery From Darkness to Deliverance by Bill Yarborough; A Truth Inspired and Terrifying Tale of Child Abduction and Mind Control
By Julie Sara Porter
Bookworm Reviews
Spoilers: Of the human experimentations, the one that is probably the most enigmatic, controversial, and infamous (and that’s saying a lot) is undoubtedly MKUltra. It was designed by the CIA, lasted from 1953-1973, and was a series of experiments that used numerous methods, such as psychoactive drugs, brainwashing, electroshocks, sensory deprivation, isolation, psychological manipulation, verbal, physical, and sexual abuse, and torture, often on unsuspecting people who did not know that they were being experimented upon or if they did, what the studies were actually for. The goal was allegedly to develop and produce drug interrogations that could be used to weaken individuals and force confessions through brainwashing and torture.More than 80 institutions were involved including military, colleges and universities, hospitals, prisons, and pharmaceutical companies.There were many deaths connected to the project, most notably Frank Olson, a US Aemy biochemist and biological researcher. Olson was secretly given LSD without his knowledge or consent and died after falling from a 13th story window a week later. MKUltra was a blatant violation of human rights and revealed the CIA’s abuse of power, particularly with regards to withholding consent and an inability to uphold democratic principles.The project officially ended in 1973 and was revealed to the public in 1975. In 1977, a Freedom of Information Act request uncovered 20,000 documents related to MKUltra. Surviving information was declassified in 2001.
Despite the declassification, there is plenty of speculation about many other experiments, methods, real goals, how far it reached, who was experimented on, and even more frightening whether it’s still going on. Some of it can’t be officially confirmed or verified but many first hand accounts and personal testimonies suggest that some of those theories might be more fact than fiction. Among those speculations are whether MKUltra targeted or experimented on children. There are no confirmed or definitive answers whether or not children were experimented on, though there are first hand testimonies from those who claim to have been child victims of MKUltra’s experimentation programs. One of those people is Bill Yarborough. He believes that he, his brother, and sister spent the summer of 1958 being experimented on for MKUltra, They blocked the memories out only to begin recalling them in the 1980s. Their experience was the inspiration for Yarborough’s semi autobiographical novel, Memories of MK-Ultra: A Journey of Discovery from Darkness to Deliverance.
Now it’s worth noting that even though Yarborough insists that the kernel of his book that he and his siblings were part of an MKUltra experiment is true, the book is not actually about them. It is only based on them and is considered a work of fiction. The perspectives from doctors, researchers, and military personnel are speculated upon by Yarborough himself. Also he acknowledges that many of the esoteric themes and paranormal situations might have been triggered not by actual events but by trauma, drugs, and altered memories. Because of this, from this point forward, I will treat the book as fiction and refer to the context within the book itself for the remainder of this review.
In 1958, Tommy Matthews, his sister, Beth, and brother, Curtis were kidnapped during a family vacation in Washington D.C. They spend several weeks being educated and monitored in a secret MKUltra facility by various personnel including Dr. Rudolf Holtzman, an expert on mind control. The children are subjected to sexual abuse, sensory deprivation, mind control, psychoactive drugs, extrasensory perception tests and various other tests. Even though the experiment only lasts for a few weeks and the children are eventually released to their parents, they are left seriously damaged well into adulthood, particularly Tommy. He develops a very aggressive and violent sex drive and mysterious outside forces influence him to one day become President of the United States.
The book alternates between Tommy's perspective and Holtzman’s. Holtzman's chapters present detail by detail what exactly happened to the children during those weeks and the experiments are harrowing. They are prostituted by a pedophiliac soldier. The researchers create mental associations with actions such as putting a fear of death into Tommy if he fails in school. They use hypnosis and subliminal messages to make Beth see ghosts and spirits and brainwash and drug Curtis to the point that he can barely function as an adult. It's hard enough to imagine this treatment on adults but to picture it on children makes it ten times worse.
The experiments make one wonder whether the military and researchers even thought about the long term effects of what they were doing. Okay, they might have created people who could withstand torture or in the case of the book get elected into positions of power but they could just as easily have created people with extreme psychological disorders that might be unable to function within any society. Holtzman does consider these possibilities up to a point becoming a moral center in MKUltra, well sort of.
Holtzman questions some of the ill treatment and the means and motives of his colleagues, particularly those who had ties to the Nazi Party in Germany. However, he still allows the experimentation to happen and monitors the children's progress as though they were lab rats. He is also concerned with outside influences on the children particularly Shoney, an older boy who shows a protective big brotherly streak towards the Matthews children. Shoney becomes their only link to the outside world and the closest thing to a positive parental figure that they have during that time and one would argue even afterwards since their parents are ultimately found wanting.
Holtzman cares about the children, but is threatened by Shoney’s bond with them.
The impact of the experiments is felt even after the children return to their parents and into their school days. It makes their mark forever and shapes them into adulthood. Tommy in particular is affected by the expectations set on him by his parents and the researchers. The fear of failure equated with death causes him to become an overachiever throughout school and conjure up paranoid delusions about authority figures. He also has very aggressive sexual impulses connected to violent images and news. Energetic fast paced music connects him to his ambitious side and future goals. All of these associations and connections lead to him becoming an ambitious political figure one who will lead, connive, conspire and if that doesn't work destroy everything around him to fulfill his vision.
While Tommy's path is set towards outside ambitions, Beth’s is more set towards the mystical and otherworldly thanks to MKUltra’s tests on remote viewing and astral projection. A literate and creative girl, she became tormented by visions of aliens and ghosts that she sees out of the corner of her eye and very vivid dreams of other worlds. Beth rebels against her parents and in the late 60’s walks the hippy path. She constantly looks to different religions such as Christianity, Occult, and New Age practices for spiritual validation. Her mystical experiences inspire her to become a best selling Science Fiction author and study hypnosis to retrieve her and her brothers’ memories.
Even though Beth and Tommy were traumatized by MKUltra, they are still able to function as adults and carve out something resembling lives of their own despite the ill treatment. They are shaped but not entirely beaten. The same could not be said for Curtis making his story the most traumatic of all. He obtains a fascination for masculine and virile images of superheroes and larger than life performers like John Wayne inspiring him to become an actor and stuntman. However, inside his masculine and virile exterior is a frightened little boy. Of the three siblings, Curtis has the hardest time adjusting to the outside world and is tormented by visual and auditory hallucinations and paranoid violent delusions. He ends up institutionalized under Tommy's care.
Three children were used, abused, and betrayed and became completely damaged, programmed, disturbed, and ruined as adults. All because of a secret government project that led to decades of distrust, suspicion, violence, and insanity, destroyed many lives, and ultimately proved nothing.
