Forgotten Favorites: Fifth Grade Monsters By Mel Gilden

Forgotten Favorites: Fifth Grade Monsters

By Julie Sara Porter, Bookworm

Besides introducing lists of favorite recommended books by topic, the other goal that I want to achieve with this blog is to bring to light some long-forgotten favorites to introduce the Readers to some older books either for the first time or to dig up some old memories. Not all of these will be readily available and some maybe out of print, but it’s like looking for buried treasure. The search is often worth it. If you know of any Forgotten Favorites that would be good for a future entry, please let me know here or on Facebook.

The first of the “Forgotten Favorites” is a favorite series from my childhood: Fifth Grade Monsters created by Mel Gilden, written by Gilden (and one book by Ann Hodgman) and illustrated by John Pierard. The 15 book series was published by Avon-Camelot from 1987-1991 and is unfortunately out of print. It was meant for a 3^rd-5th grade reading level but there are plenty of layers for adults to laugh at and understand.

The series focuses on Danny Keegan, a normal 10-year-old boy from Brooklyn, NY who on his first day of fifth grade in P.S. 13, meets some new students, who are stranger than most. That’s because they are monsters in the Universal movies tradition. They are:

 Howie Wolfner, an English boy turns into a werewolf at will and during thunderstorms. C.D. Bitesky the son of “an old and respected Transylvanian family” is a vampire that turns into a bat and sucks on something called Fluid of Life from a thermos (more than likely a kid-friendly substitute for blood). Frankie and Elisa Stein, a pair of twins from West Germany with bolts on their necks can harness electricity from their bodies like a couple of Frankenstein’s Monsters. Thankfully, their personalities aren’t like the ones in the movies. These kids are bright, eloquent, sweet, and very mature for their ages

(Sometimes too unbelievably mature for their ages.).

As with many long-running series, new characters are added to the gang: Barbara Keegan, Danny’s younger sister is at first scared of the monsters, but then emerges as a true friend. Ryan Webler, a normal 10-year-old boy and Danny’s next-door neighbor has ambitions on becoming a journalist. Gilly Finn, a Broadway show-tunes singing mermaid has fins on her wrists and ankles.

Many of the books in the series feature the kids encountering other supernatural creatures from horror films and books such as zombies, ghosts, witches, sea serpents, and blobs. In later installments they delve into the worlds of fantasy by meeting trolls, dwarves, and will o’ the wisps and science fiction by stumbling into parallel universes and encountering time travel.

But the worst monsters they encounter are human; usually the school bully, Stevie Brickwald and his sidekicks class clown, Jason Nickles and school gossip, Angela Marconi.

The books are treats for lovers of speculative fiction, because they are riddled with inside jokes and references that even the most casual horror movie buff will get. Many of which are featured below. Any Reader could flip open the pages and find a new reference that will cause them to smile and laugh or groan at the cringe-worthy puns.

There is a deeper subtext to the Fifth Grade Monsters which makes this series stand out from many of the other horror books for kids like Goosebumps or even the Bunnicula series. The Monster Kids are compared to humans with special abilities or physical and mental disabilities which often make them capable of doing things or thinking differently from their peers and are often sources of derision from other kids.

Besides the ability analogy, the Monster Kids are also treated like racial minorities or different immigrant groups that arrive in America simply because their parents want to take part in the American Dream. Like the ‘Toons in Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Gilden used this odd premise of monsters to make stronger points about racism, ethnocentricity, and the problems faced by immigrants.

The kids are repeatedly taunted with insults like “Go back to your own country,” by classmates particularly Stevie. The Monster Kids look upon monster movies about as favorably as modern African-Americans look upon the silent film Birth of a Nation, holding them up as negative stereotypes made to make their families appear villainous.

In one book, the kids particularly C.D. give a presentation in class about how their ancestors were ostracized and derided by local villagers in their home countries. In another book, a group similar to the Hitler Youth is formed to deport monsters and other supernatural creatures. It’s brilliant and frightening at the same time, that a long-cancelled juvenile series still can retain relevance today.

In this review, each book will be given a brief plot synopsis, a section for inside jokes, references, and trivia (from movie references to running characters and situations etc.) and favorite passages and quotes. As always, spoilers are to be expected. The books in the series are as follows:

1.  M is For Monster- The opening book in the series mostly serves as an introduction to Danny and his new friends. The plot is slight. (Who took Ms. Cosgrove’s P.S. 13 model and can they get it back before Parent’s Night?). The plot sets up the situation building on each character’s special abilities and how they use them to aid Danny and sometimes inadvertently cause trouble. It also sets up their conflicts with Stevie Brickwald, who immediately threatens to “pulverize” the new kids.

Inside Jokes and References:

• There are plenty of running gags and references that begin in this book and continues through the others: Danny’s sister, Barbara is no doubt named for the female protagonist of Night of the Living Dead (“They’re coming to get you, Barbara!”) and he has a dog named Harryhausen, named for special effects designer/stop motion animator, Ray Harryhausen.
• The Monster Kids’ parents’ occupations are as follows: C.D. Bitesky’s father is a tailor who owns A Stich in Time Tailoring Service. Frankie and Elisa Stein’s father is a scientist who works for the government in secret projects and Mrs. Stein is his assistant. Howie Wolfner’s father is in the fabric business owning the Give ‘Em What Fur and Fabric store and his mother is an astronomer. It is never said what Danny’s parents do for a living. In one book he mentions his father is a lawyer, but it is implied to be a cover story to make the person think that his father is going to sue him.
• Most adults are not aware that the Monster Kids are actually monsters. For example Ms. Cosgrove believes that the knobs on the Stein kids’ necks are braces from an auto accident and that Howie’s transformations during thunderstorms are the result of a skin allergy or psychological problem. C.D. even says “the vampire’s main strength is that no one believes in him.” So they don’t tell many people unless they are already in on the know.
• There is a consistent mistake with Elisa’s description in the book vs. her appearance on the cover. The cover shows her as a blond girl, but the books often describe her as a dark-haired girl with streaks of gray in her hair. (Like the Bride of Frankenstein except she wears her hair down or in a ponytail.) The first book, okay, the second maybe but you would think that Gilden and the cover illustrators, possibly Pierard, would have collaborated a little better.
• The school gossip Angela Marconi’s last name is perfect for her since Giuliano Marconi is considered the inventor of the radio and the telegraph. A running characterization with her is that she brags about her family continuously referring to them, especially her father, as “pillars of the community.”
• The Steins’ ornate home has a windmill on top. (At the end of the first Universal Frankenstein film, the monster takes refuge from the torch wielding villagers inside a windmill.)
• The Stein kids’ father, Dr. Viktor Stein (named for the protagonist in Mary Shelley’s original novel), refers to his wife, Maria as “my bride.” This is a reference to the movie, Bride of Frankenstein or that in the original novel by Shelley the monster wanted Dr. Frankenstein to build him a bride and the doctor destroyed her realizing that they could create or bear children.
• Dracula is referred to by C.D. as “Uncle Vlad” (the inspiration for the original Bram Stoker novel was Vlad Dracul the Impaler) and has a reoccurring role in later installments as the mysterious enigmatic “The Count.”
• The Bitesky’s home has portraits of various relatives, many of which C.D. doesn’t know. C.D. says that they do not take any down for fear they may offend one of them.
• When C.D’s mother leans down, Danny visualizes Dr. Van Helsing (Dracula’s arch-enemy) examining bite marks on his neck and declaring him a vampire. However, Mrs. Bitesky only kisses him on the forehead to welcome him.
• To calm his frantic pet bat, Spike, C.D. sings a lullaby which quotes the lines from the movie, Dracula: “Children of the Night, what music they make.” He also refers to Howie’s howling as the music of “the children of the night,” wolves. (However since this series pre-dates Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the name for C.D.’s pet is more than likely a coincidence unless Joss Wheadon had read the series as well. :D)
• Howie says that his family is interested in astronomy “particularly the moon.” According to the old movie, The Wolf Man (and popular culture) werewolves transform during the full moon.
• When Mrs. Stein serves pizza to the kids, the garlic, a notorious herb against werewolves and vampires sends Howie and C.D. into a nervous frenzy transforming them into a wolf and bat respectively.
• As many know in different books, films, series, and RPG’s, werewolves and vampires have a frequent rivalry. While downplayed, Howie’s rugged rural more athletic persona contrasts with C.D.’s more urbane erudite sophistication and occasionally the duo take digs at each other. (After their pizza caused transformation Howie tells Mrs. Stein. “Sorry it’s a problem that runs in the blood.”  C.D. glares but then responds, “Yes, we are not just crying wolf.”) However unlike most versions, Howie and C.D. remain friends and are usually paired off together in later installments implying that they are best friends.
• Danny has a dream in which he and the Monster Kids build a new P.S. 13 model that they set to life with a lightning bolt. They dance around the monster as it awakens shouting “It’s Alive!! ALIVEE!!!” quoting the famous scene from Frankenstein.
• Stevie destroys Ms. Cosgrove’s P.S. 13 model in an attempt to frame the Monster Kids. It doesn’t work because Elisa recognizes the red drips as paint not Fluid of Life and hair that does not belong to Howie.

Favorite Passages: The introductions when the Monster kids show their many unusual abilities: During a thunderstorm, Howie turns into a wolf and wreaks havoc in the classroom destroying art projects. C.D. turns into a bat and rests in a tree during recess and reveals his pet bat, Spike for Show and Tell. The Stein Kids defend Danny by shocking Stevie with electric bolts from their fingertips after Stevie threatens him. When she is partnered with Danny for a Science project, Elisa uses the electricity from her neck bolt to turn on a light bulb.

Besides their monstrous abilities, the kids show talents as students and regular kids as well. Howie is a born athlete, who does tricks on his skateboard and plays an effortless game of kickball. C.D. is a Spelling Bee champion and Ms. Cosgrove is able to use his erudite welcoming nature to greet the Parents during Parent’s Night. Frankie Stein shows his ability at electricity by offering to fix the lighting on Ms. Cosgrove’s model so they form in parallel. Besides being equally as gifted in science as her brother, Elisa is the best at coming up with reasons for the kid’s strange behavior (such as telling Ms. Cosgrove that Howie’s transformation during a thunderstorm is the “result of a skin allergy.”)

These little scenes brilliantly characterize the Monster Kids and reveal them to be true friends of Danny and in some ways better more interesting characters than many of the human ones like Stevie.

Favorite Quote: Elisa: I think what you call a monster is all in your head, Danny.

C.D.: We are your friends. Does it matter what blood runs through our veins?

2. Born to Howl- I have a special place in my heart for this book in the series. It was the first I ever read. I ordered it from a book order form, found some new friends and is among my favorites in the series. It has very strong character development particularly within Howie Wolfner and Barbara Keegan.

Howie Wolfner has been finding his public transformations embarrassing, especially one during a school field trip to a wax museum, and decides that he doesn’t want to be a werewolf anymore. He wants to be a human boy. In going with the subtext, it could be analogous to kids with certain disabilities or illnesses that leave them isolated from their peers and feel embarrassed by them.

The gang tries various means to help him. Frankie Stein uses his database to search for cures for lycanthropy. (Remember this was the ‘80’s? Not every kid had a computer or Internet access.) The kids consult the Wolfner Family Library to search for books on the subject and visit C.D.’s neighborhood where Zelda Bella, an eccentric Gypsy woman sells them a possible cure.  Zelda Bella starts out as an unfortunate bit of stereotyping in a series that cries out against it, probably why she later appears in the series as a kindly helpful witch instead.

This is also one of the few books in the series that has a genuine B plot where the book is told from a different point of view than Danny’s. Barbara is partnered with fellow Girl’s Pathfinder, Elisa Stein. In the early chapters, Barbara is terrified at the prospect, running in terror at the sight of Howie and C.D. in their wolf and bat forms and insisting that Elisa is going to eat her brain. There is a lot of depth as she goes from being frightened and suspicious of Elisa to being a friend of the monster gang in this book and in later installments. Also, these two plots join together in an interesting way that brings out the best in Howie, Elisa, Danny, and Barbara.

Inside Jokes and References:

• In the opening Barbara and Danny return home from the public library on a foggy evening. Danny compares the scene to the horror movies that begin with two comic grave diggers encountering a monster which kills one and causes the other to run for his life. (“Someone usually Dr. Frankenstein or Sherlock Holmes gets involved.”).

• The Wax Museum is owned by a Mr. Price and his specialty area is the Chamber of Horrors. Vincent Price starred in a movie called House of Wax which was remade as Chamber of Horrors.
• Before the class enters the Chamber of Horrors, a sign appears overhead that says “Abandon Hope All Ye Who Enter Here” which is the sign before entering Hell/The Inferno in The Divine Comedy by Dante.
• In the wax museum, organ music plays from a Phantom of the Opera exhibit. Born to Howl was published in 1987, the same year that the musical Phantom of the Opera opened in London and Broadway.
• The artificial thunderstorm exhibit that frightens and transforms Howie is the Flying Dutchman, a ghost ship story about a sailor who cursed both God and the Devil during a severe storm as he sailed around the Cape of Good Hope in South Africa. The ship sank and the sailor died, and neither side wanted him. The ghost ship is cursed to circle around the Cape of Good Hope forever.
• Barbara and Elisa are members of The Girls’ Pathfinders, a group that is clearly patterned after the Girl Scouts. Their leader is named Mrs. Bumpo, named for Natty Bumpo the protagonist of James Fenimore Cooper’s Leatherstocking Tales. There are a couple of mentions of the Boy Trailblazers, a male group patterned after the Boy Scouts.
• The Girl’s Pathfinders are taking an overnight camping trip to Long Island. Barbara prepares for her trip as though she were going to the wilderness. It is somewhat hilarious in hindsight, because Long Island had developed considerably since then and as Danny mentioned “is hardly untouched by human hands,” even then.
• In Pierard’s first illustration, Barbara has dropped her nature books on the ground and many of the titles are visible: Fun With Acorns, Romance of Shells, Desert Solitaire and others. Clearly, she takes camping out seriously. Usually she reads horse books, so this is unusual for her, Danny remarks.
• Howie describes lycanthropy as “the condition for being a werewolf.” In actuality, it is a mental illness in which a person exhibits wolf-like characteristics so technically he is right, I suppose.
• The Wolfner Family lives in the Talbot Arms, a modern luxury apartment. It is named for Larry Talbot, the protagonist in the movie, The Wolf Man.
• This book is the first time that Danny and his friends meet Howie’s parents so they apparently did not attend Parent’s Night in the previous book. But it does make sense; they probably thought three werewolves in one building could do much damage so Mr. and Mrs. Wolfner may have thought it best to stay home.
• One of the Wolfner Family books describes a hunt in which the werewolf is hunted, captured, and killed-possibly similar to fox hunting. The description traumatizes C.D. who admits, “Our people have similar troubles.”
• C.D.’s neighborhood is based on many of the ethnic neighborhoods found in Brooklyn, in this case largely consisting of Eastern Europeans. It features stores like Moishe’s Dance and Read, a cart that sells warm fresh bagels, movie theatres that show foreign films from countries like Latvia, and various other characteristics.
• Barbara disguises Harryhausen as the “Hound of Heck,” similar to Hounds of Hell. The term was no doubt selected in keeping with the intended readership. However, later in the book there are two paragraphs in which Barbara compares camping out to Hell, and uses the exact term.
• While Zelda Bella’s werewolf treatment is never actually tested, later books in the series reveal that she does have some magic powers, mostly concentrating on love spells, so it may have worked.
• Earlier when Danny asked if the Monster Kids dress up for Halloween, C.D. responds, “Dressing up is not necessary but we do try to fit in.” In the final scenes the kids’ costumes are as follows: Danny is a robot, Barbara is a Gypsy fortune teller (as is Mrs. Bitesky), Frankie is the Creature from the Black Lagoon, Elisa is a Valkyrie (in keeping with her German heritage), C.D. is both Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and Howie is his cousin Anwar, apparently a mummy from Egypt. Which leads to interesting possibilities that monsters can marry other types of monsters, so is one of Howie’s aunts or uncles a werewolf and the other a mummy?

Favorite Passage: The class field trip to the Wax Museum is excellently captured. I recalled my own previous trips to the San Francisco Wax Museum and the St. Louis Wax Museum on Laclede’s Landing. The details on the figures are well described and a guest can really feel like they are being watched. As Danny describes it, “Even when the people were good, Eleanor Roosevelt, John Kennedy, and Martin Luther King Jr. the effect was pretty creepy. Suddenly (Danny) was not looking forward to the Chamber of Horrors, an area full of people who were not so nice.”

Of course the Chamber of Horrors does not disappoint with the usual cast of characters: Jack the Ripper, Henry VIII executing Anne Boleyn, a woman being burned as a witch, a mummy, Frankenstein’s Monster, Dracula, a werewolf and so on. Humorously, the Monster Kids show little fear of the exhibits saying that they remind them of relatives or make critical comments about the displays themselves. Danny reasons, “One person’s Chamber of Horrors is another person’s family room.”

Favorite Quote:  1. C.D.: We can’t help being what we are. Besides being a werewolf must have its advantage. Find them, use them.

Danny: Sure, if life gives you hair, be a werewolf. 

2. Barbara: Elisa, I’m sorry I’ve been such a creep.

Elisa: I’m just sorry it took us so long to become friends.

3. There’s A Batwing in My Lunchbox by Ann Hodgman-This is the only book in the series written by someone other than Gilden and the gift of it is Hodgman writes the characters and situations so well that the Reader barely recognizes the difference. This book is just as much a part of the series as the others. I also have a personal connection to this book of which I will speak later.

Ms. Cosgrove assigns her class projects on Thanksgiving in which they will research the story of the Pilgrims and Indians including their food, costumes, etc. C.D. Bitesky however speaks up in class saying that he knows nothing about the Pilgrims, his ancestors had nothing to do with the story, and that he feels left out in the Thanksgiving Day study plan. After other children defend C.D’s words, Ms. Cosgrove changes her assignment to the students researching and bringing food that their ancestors originally ate and having a “Thanksgiving Dinner-Brooklyn Style.” However, Stevie Brickwald is not thrilled about the changes in the assignment and threatens to have C.D. kicked out of school and pounded to the ground.

While searching C.D’s mother’s files, the kids find a recipe called “The Potion to Vanquish Enemies” AKA “The Potion of Friendliness” in which the Bitesky family served to approaching angry peasants and enemies. C.D. presents the potion to class and allows Stevie to take the first sip. However the results aren’t quite what anyone planned.

Now I will mention my personal connection to this book:  I had always admired the stand that Hodgman (and Gilden in the rest of the series) took in defending all immigrants that arrived in America and how they all had similar struggles. This book and its message always stuck with me, so later when I worked at the Indianapolis Metropolitan High School Library from 2010-2011, I took the memory of this book with me.

For Thanksgiving, I gathered several books on different ethnicities, cultures, and races of people who entered America to create a “Celebrating All Our Heritages For Thanksgiving” display. It was one of my most popular displays (and among the most interesting to create). Thank you Mr. Gilden and Ms. Hodgman, for creating a message that stuck with me for over twenty years.

Inside Jokes and References

• This book doesn’t have as many references to monster movies as others in the series, perhaps because of the change in authors, but there are some interesting things of note.
• A running gag throughout the book is that since it’s a week after Halloween, Danny still hasn’t finished his Halloween Candy and has to bring it to school for lunch “but the novelty has worn off” so he is sick of candy.
• When Ms. Cosgrove first mentions the Thanksgiving assignment class flirt, Marla Willaby wants to be Priscilla Alden. Alden was not only a real person, but she was a featured character in the poem “The Courtship of Miles Standish” by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. In the story, Miles Standish, a leader in the Pilgrim community wanted to marry a much younger woman, Priscilla Mullins but he was too shy and asked his younger friend, John Alden to propose on his behalf. Alden himself was in love with Priscilla and his second-hand proposal left Priscilla confused and she thought that John was asking for himself. She married John Alden. Incensed at first, Standish eventually relented and became a friend of the family. No one knows how much of the story is true. Though John Alden and Priscilla Mullins did get married, Standish was a great deal older than them so it is very doubtful.
• Stevie Brickwald mentions that his ancestors came over on the Mayflower and accuses C.D. of being “unpatriotic” and a “traitor.” Stevie’s notable family background is confirmed in a later book Things That Go Bark In The Park in which it is revealed the Brickwalds were among the oldest families in Brooklyn.
• Twice the narration makes sarcastic mention of other “Young Adult books that the librarian always forced Danny to read.” (Hodgman, a former editor, probably read many of these books herself). The first takes place when Danny and other Monster Kids discuss C.D’s issues with Thanksgiving and how they can help: “A kid was in some kind of trouble, and his friends were worried about him. They got together and decided to confront him with his problem. At first he refused to believe there was a problem. Then he broke down and admitted that he needed help, and they all promised to be there for him-‘it will be hard but we will face this together’-that kind of things. Hugs and happy endings for all.”
• The second “Young Adult books” reference takes place after Frankie, Elisa, and Howie are nervous about speaking up in class because they don’t want to call attention to themselves: “Standing up for your rights was supposed to be worth embarrassing yourself and having everyone else in the world hate you. Despite jeers, taunts, and not being picked in the gym, you stuck stubbornly to what you knew was right. Gradually you won the respect of others and then you got on the news as a kid who had the courage of his convictions.” “Obviously the authors of these books had never met Stevie Brickwald,” Danny thinks afterward.
• There is one discontinuity between this book and the others. After an accidental fire caused by a spark from Elisa turns on the school sprinkler system, Howie transforms into a werewolf. However, the other books (and Batwing itself) state that Howie only turns into a werewolf during thunderstorms, not just rain.
• Barbara makes a reference to having a Jem doll. For those who were not children of the ‘80’s (and hopefully don’t remember the 2015 movie flop that closed after two weeks), Jem was from the animated series known as Jem and the Holograms. Jerrica Benton, a young music executive turned into the rock star, Jem, with the help of star earrings that are connected to Synergy, an advanced computer that can produce holograms.
• This book is a rarity in that many of the other students in Danny’s class are identified and are given lines. They include Robin Zimmer, Bill Swenson, Prentice Sturgeon, Benjy Sax, Darwood Robinson, and Mike Gioia. Also, Angela Marconi and Marla Willaby are given more character development in this book than in many of the others in the series.
• Howie refers to two British meals Bubble and Squeak, fried beef and cabbage and Toad in the Hole, sausages in batter. Angela Marconi refers to sfogliatelle, a pastry similar to cheesecake.
• Mrs. Bitesky’s recipe files include different variation on how to cook Fluid of Life including Thickened Red Sauce, Ruby Lemonade, and Plasma Pancakes. (“And why did one recipe simply titled ‘Liver’ sound so sinister?”)
• Among the ingredients to make Potion of Friendliness are: Vulture’s claws, two pounds of human hair, four drops of syrup from a sundew plant, a gram of crocus stamens, a bar of black soap, a large turnip stuck with cloves, a pigeon’s nest, white sand, horsehairs, potato sugar AKA kumplicukor, one berry from atropa belladonna-deadly nightshade, one cup of ants’ eggs, and five waves of a toad over the potion. Stir five hundred times. Yumm, yumm.
• To get their portion of the ingredients Danny and Barbara go to the Bronx Zoo for the vulture’s claws, a hair salon called Pearl’s Head O’ Hair for the human hair, the Brooklyn Botanical Garden for the sundew syrup, and a grocery store for the crocus stamens or saffron
• In his presentation, C.D. mentions that when he was very young, he saw his uncle’s castle burn down by angry peasants and if his uncle hadn’t turned into a bat (“or moved very quickly”) he would have burned to death. (While M is for Monster states that none of C.D’s relatives ever die to quote Iago in Aladdin: “You’d be surprised about what you can live through.” Plus, the series implies that vampires are still vulnerable to certain things like wooden stakes through the heart like werewolves are to silver bullets.)
• One of the chapters is entitled “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” in reference to the 1950’s film in which people are transformed by pod aliens from outer space into alternate versions of themselves. It is fitting because after Stevie drinks the potion, his personality also changes temporarily.

Favorite Passages: 1. C.D. tells Ms. Cosgrove that he doesn’t want to participate in the original Thanksgiving Month project because his ancestors were not Pilgrims and he doesn’t feel it is right for him to participate. Instead of being angry many of the other students, including Angela Marconi who before and since doesn’t like the Monster Kids, stand up for C.D’s decision mentioning that their families didn’t come over on the Mayflower either and that all immigrants should be celebrated. Ms. Cosgrove, recognizing her own unintentional ethnocentrisms, decides to change the project to fit all cultures not just the Pilgrims.

2. When C.D. gives his presentation, he goes into a touching demonstration about how his family were often persecuted by locals. The locals often accused them of such things as crops failure (because the vampires “gave them the Evil Eye”) or if someone died (because the vampires “lured the person’s spirit from their body”). This shows that prejudice is the same the world over and that people often attack anyone they consider outsiders.

Favorite Quotes 1. Howie: Actually I agree with (C.D.) The Pilgrims probably would have run my ancestors out of town-or burned them at the stake. I feel a little strange about making a big fuss about the Pilgrims myself.

2. C.D.: In America, in England, in Transylvania-perhaps all over the world-no one likes people who are different. And this was especially true of my family, because we were so very different from the people around us.

4. The Pet of Frankenstein-This book is average, not as good as many of the others. The plot is a typical hoary one in kid’s literature: Someone overhears someone else talking and they think they are talking about them. So, they spend the whole plot worrying about it instead of you know talking to the other person, because we would have a short book. In the end, they discover that the person wasn’t talking about them at all, but something entirely different.

Despite the trite plot, this book in the series has strong characterization with Frankie Stein, who in the previous book is usually seen as a shy quiet science genius that often has his sister, Elisa speak for him in class. One wonders if the series were made today if there would be questions whether Frankie may have Asperger’s Syndrome or be on the Autism Spectrum.

He and the other kids overhear his parents complaining about the younger generation not measuring up to the previous ones and they may have to “fix them.” Frankie is fearful that his parents want to take him apart and reprogram him; after all they put him and his sister together. He wants to prove to his father that he can outsmart his ancestors, even his great granduncle the Baron Frankenstein himself. Frankie and his friends do some research and find a mechanical dog that the Baron never finished, so Frankie is determined to bring the little guy to life.

Inside Jokes and References

• There is a definite generation gap with the Mad Room and the Steins’ labs. Dr. Stein’s lab is a typical one found in the older  horror films with large beakers, Bunsen burners, tesla coils, electric lights, and a slab. Frankie’s lab is more modern with a home entertainment center complete with a computer with Intellectron access, laser jet printer, television, videos, and video games (many of which he created).
• In the first illustration, Frankie’s lab has a poster of a cute cuddly brontosaurus. The gang would later encounter dinosaurs in the final book, The Secret of Dinosaur Bog.
• Throughout the book, Barbara has a stuffed animal called Doc that is part of a set called Snuggly Mutts, dogs that are battery powered and can move, bark, shake their heads and tails. They are probably a composite of ‘80’s toys, the Fluppy Dogs (cute stuffed animals perfect for cuddling) and Teddy Ruxpin (a cute battery powered stuffed bear that speaks and is connected to a cassette player which allows it to tell stories.).
• Frankie creates a video game called Monsterland which involves a battle between a mummy and a gill man AKA The Creature of the Black Lagoon. He brings it to Show-And-Tell and the other kids want to play with it including Stevie Brickwald.
• At one point Howie listens to a CD player which plays what sounds to Danny like whistles and high pitched bird sounds, but are more than likely sounds that attract dogs and wolves.
• Two of the chapter titles have not-so-clever puns “Fangs a lot Uncle Emeric” and “The Very Bats in Electronics.” At one point Dr. Frankenstein describes his son as a “microchip off the old block.”
• The catacombs in the Bitesky home reveal three coffins, two large and one small implying C.D. and his parents sleep in the same catacombs. They also have soil from Transylvania tucked in them. Legend has it that vampires rest on top of the soil of their home.
• Howie implies that he is claustrophobic. While in the catacombs, he reveals that he is nervous and wants to be where “there is sky and the moon.” (That explains why he and his parents live in the penthouse so they can be closer to the sky.)
• C.D.’s Uncle Emeric owns an electronic supply company called Chrioptera Electronics. He also collects early inventions such as Thomas Edison’s early phonograph recording of his recital of “Mary Had a Little Lamb,” the apple core that reportedly hit Sir Isaac Newton on the head, and possibly Galileo’s telescope.
• The Stein Family created their own version of the Frankenstein story called Stitches. In this version, the Baron and his assistant Igor (who is not a hunchback but a normal guy) create the monster with the assistance of Baron Frankenstein’s girlfriend/nurse. In the end the doctor and his girlfriend get married and legally adopt their creation as their son.
• There is a plot hole in this book. The kids find a secret room in which the Baron put his most private projects that he kept secret from his talkative girlfriend and assistant (including the dog). They discover the door to the secret room of which Dr. Stein is unaware of its existence. However, both this book and M is for Monster mention that Dr. Stein brought the majority of the house and lab stone by stone from West Germany. If he brought the house, and rebuilt it, then not only would he have known where the secret room was located but he would have to know how to reinstall it in Brooklyn.
• The mechanical dog is named Bruno which is the German word for bear.

Favorite Passages: After finding Bruno, the mechanical dog, the kids find out that it needs to have an electronic brain to work. So, Frankie suggests using Barbara’s Snuggly Mutt, Doc. After much debate about whether they want to take it which Frankie refuses (“I do not like threatening or stealing. If I do such a thing, I will deserve whatever my parents have in mind for me.”), Frankie simply asks her for it.

Barbara agrees noting that Doc could still be cuddled and C.D. offers to ask his father to stitch it back up for her. Barbara’s reaction is heart-warming and shows how much she evolved as a character and how she has become a true friend of theirs. It also shows how loyal the friends are and how much they are willing to help each other.

Favorite quote: Barbara: You guys are wonderful. I don’t know why I ever thought you were monsters.

Howie: All depends on your definition.

5. Z is for Zombie-In Born to Howl, Danny wonders “If there were friendly monsters in Brooklyn might there be monsters that are not-so-friendly?” This book answers that question. It focuses more on suspense and action than characterization, but it does have some interesting elements of horror. It also illustrates the differences between

 monsters that have free will like werewolves, vampires, and Frankenstein’s monsters (at least these versions) vs. those that don’t have free will like zombies that are created only  

to follow their masters’ orders.

A new pizza restaurant, Zombie Pizza Parlor, has opened in the neighborhood and it should be a dream for the Monster Kids especially Howie and C.D. because the advertisements say they don’t serve garlic. Danny and his family check it out for a family dinner and when the entertainment, consisting of singing and dancing zombies, arrives Danny is in for quite a surprise: One of the dancers looks like Ms. Cosgrove, his teacher!

Danny and his friends investigate the restaurant and its eccentric owner, Dr. Zoe. With the help of C.D.’s father, the kids resolve to rescue Ms. Cosgrove and the rest of Brooklyn from Dr. Zoe and these strange zombies.

Inside jokes, references, and trivia

• Dr. Zoe makes his debut in an unusual way: He appears in the air in a propelled airship with a swan carriage. Clearly he is a Steampunker before his time. He reminds Danny of a movie called Master of the World.
• The announcement of the Zombie Pizza Parlor opening is in the Brooklyn Bugle, a small free newspaper that Danny says “everyone gets whether they want to or not.” Mostly the Bugle features parties from rich people and Danny’s mother says she only reads it for the coupons. Later Ryan Webler contacts one of the reporters from the Bugle for a story.
• Since this book is set in the spring, C.D. is dressed in a white tuxedo instead of his usual black one. He says the black one “is too heavy” and the white one is a “summer weight.” (To Danny he looks more like a character from a 1940’s musical than from a 1930’s horror film.)
• Ms. Cosgrove plans on using the Zombie Pizza Parlor to teach the students about how small businesses are run and how math is used in business and cooking.
• The Zombie Pizza Parlor is on the corner of Cassidy Street and Boyd Way. Actor, William Boyd was best known for his western character, Hopalong Cassidy. Later, we find there is a convenience store called Shop-Along Cassidy next to the Pizza Parlor.
• The staff of the Zombie Pizza Parlor speak in very monotone voices, dance, and snap their fingers but have no enjoyment out of it as though their movements were just a job. They are often referred to as “hip dancing zombies.” We later learn that part of being a zombie is to be hypnotized,  feel compelled to move, and being devoid of any emotion.
• The house band of the Zombie Pizza Parlor is Spaghetti and the Meatballs of which a zombified Ms. Cosgrove is a member.
• The substitute teacher of Ms. Cosgrove’s class is Mrs. Bradley, a very dull pushy instructor and the principal of P.S. 13 is named Ms. Gunderson
• We see the return of Mr. Price of the Wax Museum. Since the damage Howie had done in Born to Howl was not as great as Howie feared, he had forgiven the young wolfboy and offered the kids free passes to the museum. He is also the first adult to be let in on the secret of the monster kids’ identities.
• Another possible inter-marriage between different types of monsters: C.D. mentions that he has relatives from the Caribbean who are zombies, but he has never actually met them.
• Mr. Price mentions the legends about Caribbean zombies: dead people brought back to life and ordered around by a live person. If given salt, the zombie realizes that he is a zombie and falls over. Elisa becomes aware of the fact that the zombies at the Zombie Pizza Parlor aren’t traditional zombies, since pizza has plenty of salt in the crust, sausage, and pepperoni but had no effect on the zombies whatsoever.
• To help rescue Ms. Cosgrove, Mr. and Mrs. Bitesky perform the Rite of the Crowing Rooster which consists of the Biteskys dancing around crabgrass with a rubber chicken (probably supposed to be a real chicken), something personal of Ms. Cosgrove-in this case C.D’s spelling test with a 100% in her handwriting, and a strip of Velcro to the song “Papa Loves Mambo” by Xavier Cugat.  This is a popular Mambo tune from the 1950’s most famously sung by Perry Como. Fans of Back to the Future II will remember it playing in 1955-Biff’s car as Marty McFly tries to get the Gray’s Sports’ Almanac from him. The rite not only doesn’t work but the rubber chicken comes to life and is named Mambo.
• The climactic passage where a bunch of zombies are crowding around the kids is no doubt based on the similar scenes from Night of the Living Dead and the Michael Jackson’s music video, “Thriller.” Perhaps the idea of hip dancing zombies came also from Jackson’s video as well.
• Ms. Cosgrove possibly for the first time believes that there are monsters in Brooklyn when she asks C.D.’s father “There aren’t zombies in Brooklyn are there?” To which Mr. Bitesky responds “No more so than there are werewolves and vampires.”

Favorite Passages: When Dr. Zoe has kidnapped Danny he uses his machine to turn him into a zombie. We get inside the head of what it’s like to be a zombie where Danny doesn’t think anything, including helping his friends, seems important.

He can think and feel but nothing matters. He only feels compelled to obey Zoe’s orders without emotion including making the “World’s Greatest Pizza” (which falls flat on Zoe’s face). It is eerie to read about a character who was once thoughtful, considerate, and a loyal staunch friend turn so quickly into a being devoid of emotion.

Favorite quote: Danny (after suggesting leaving Ms. Cosgrove as a zombie because she might be happier that way): Aren’t you happy being a werewolf, Howie? Aren’t the Stein kids happy being buckets of bolts? Isn’t C.D. happy being a vampire?

C.D.: Yes, but this is different?

Danny: How is it different?

Elisa: Danny asks an important question. It deserves an important answer.

Howie: Listen old chum, the difference is simply this: Most people even the most unusual have control over their thoughts and actions. But if you’re a zombie, nothing is interesting, fun or exciting. A zombie has no ideas. He can’t do anything he wants to ever.

Danny: I gotcha. It’s all that can’t do stuff that makes being a zombie bad, not the monster stuff.

6. Monster Mashers-Of all the books in the series, this one takes the allegorical subtext of comparing Monsters to different racial and ethnic immigration groups and runs with it making it one of the best written of the series in terms of theme and characterization.

Danny and the Monster Kids have discovered a new group has been formed called Monster Mashers, created by Arthur Debarber who seeks to rid Brooklyn of monsters and supernatural creatures. He already has acquired a following with adults and kids, particularly the Monster Gang’s nemeses, Angela Marconi, Jason Nickles, and of course Stevie Brickwald becoming sort of like the Hitler Youth. Their first target is Mother Scary.

Mother Scary, in actuality the Monster Kids’ friend Zelda Bella, is the host of a Saturday afternoon show that shows old monster movies. The kids try to find a way to beat Debarber, lend support to their friend Zelda Bella, and hopefully end the Monster Mashers’ crusade before Mother Scary is deported and the Mashers set their sights on other targets: the monsters themselves.

Inside Jokes, References, and Trivia

• The title Monster Mashers comes from a 1950’s novelty song, “Monster Mash” by Boris Picket. It still plays on radio stations around Halloween.
• The kids visit Cheapo City in C.D.’s neighborhood a store that sells toys, snacks, and other knick-knacks at inexpensive prices like Dollar Tree or Five and Below. They also see a video store which has a Romanian comedy film called Much Humor in the Cornfield After the Harvest, which C.D. says is highly symbolic.
• Danny and Howie reveal their interest in old movies by mentioning the Marx Brothers.
• Mother Scary’s Saturday Matinee is a knock-off of the various shows that have shown monster movies, usually involving some oddly dressed character showing them and making comments about how awful the films are. Among the most famous movie hosts are Vampira, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, Ghoulardi, Svenghouli,  Son of Svenghouli, and Dr. Paul Bearer (a favorite of my Mom’s when she grew up in Tampa, Florida-she even got his autograph once). Of course the most famous well-known series that shows bad horror films is Mystery Science Theater 3000. According the book, there have been several Mother Scary hosts for years.
• While the Monster Kids once again mention their hatred of monster movies, they do want to see the series to support their friend, Zelda Bella. The movie they see is Some Like It Scary, that is so bad that the kids and Mr. Keegan (who was a fan of Mother Scary since he was a kid) make fun of it and laugh having a good time. Many of the mistakes that they point out in the film, such as a vampire character being clearly played by two different actors in the same movie, are based on real mistakes from films such as Plan 9 from Outer Space directed by Ed Wood.
• Mother Scary hosts a contest in which fans can dress up like a monster and the five winners will be featured on a future episode. Instead of being themselves, Danny and the Monster Kids dress as each other: Howie dresses as a vampire, C.D. as a werewolf, Danny as a Frankenstein’s Monster, The Stein Twins dress as mummies and they win the contest. Barbara dresses up like Mother Scary and wins a special prize for ingenuity and gets to appear on the show as well.
• Mr. Keegan shows the kids the patented Mother Scary Salute: Raising your hands and shaking them in the air while crying, “Boo” then cackling like a witch. Since Mr. Keegan is a fan of old horror movies, he may be okay with his children’s’ friends’ identities if he knew about them of course.
• Frankie Stein is certainly ahead of his time. He has a Minute Monster Developer which developed photographs quickly like a digital camera. He also has a small carrying device which records, addresses, numbers, and other information-an early iPad or Blackberry.
• The Monster Mashers’ slogan “Keep Our Homes Safe. Keep Brooklyn Monster Free” might carry a bit of unintentional relevance these days.
• The Steins mention how familiar they are with the concept of one person whipping up the rest in a nervous frenzy. Considering the time period when the books were written, how old the Monster Kids and their parents are, one wonders how the Nazis may have treated the Steins during the Holocaust or how the Soviet-influenced Romanian government may have treated the Biteskys during the Cold War. One possibility for the Bitesky family could be found in the 1986 Twilight Zone episode “Red Snow” in which vampires are exiled to Siberia by the Soviet government being considered signs of “a decadent bourgeois superstitious past.” The vampires befriend the Siberian locals and exiles by taking the blood of wolves.
•  Howie’s family  may have been relatively safer in England as compared to his friends. But considering the books in his family library describe “werewolf hunts,” probably from the upper-class, and the ‘80’s saw the rise of Skinheads/Neo-Nazis in Britain, werewolves being safer in England than vampires in Romania/Transylvania and Frankenstein’s Monsters in Germany was probably not a certainty.
• Arm-Wrestling Women From the Moon and the Hand of Irving are two more movies shown on Mother Scary’s program as well as Some Like It Scary. None of the films are real and are based on real monster movies from the time.
• Zelda Bella is from Romania but hadn’t lived there since she was a kid. This explains why in Born to Howl, Danny thought she had a “typical Brooklyn housewife” accent.
• Zelda Bella lives in a retirement community called Halloween Acres and is a member of a coven of 13 elderly kind-hearted witches.
• The Horrorifics are a group of Mother Scary fans back when the show was on radio. They eschew watching horror films on modern conveniences (which at the time consisted of VCR’s) saying if “it’s not on film it’s not a movie.” Their leader, J. Manly Forest, is the publisher of Marvelous Movie Monsters magazine and later is revealed to be a collector of monster movie memorabilia. He is based on the late, Forest J. Ackerman, monster movie memorabilia collector and publisher of Famous Monsters magazine.
• One of the witches, Ida is afraid of heights and warns the kids not to climb. Frankie calls it “grown up logic: I’m afraid of heights, so you cannot climb.” Grown-up logic features again in the series in Monster Boy.

Favorite Passage: 1. The funniest moments are when the kids dress up as other monsters. Some of the most humorous parts are Howie and C.D’s reactions. Howie finds putting on a Bitesky-style tuxedo difficult and C.D. is disgusted with putting on torn clothes and pretending to chew on chicken bones. It shows the differences between the two but how they are able to still play off of them  as a fun duo and best friends.

2. In a very frightening and unfortunately all-too real moment, Danny and the Monster Kids go to school and see Stevie, Angela, Jason and other kids wearing Monster Mashers Buttons, admiring Debarber, and threatening that the Monster Kids and their families will be deported. This passage shows how quickly hate groups can be formed and how children can be swept along with these prejudices and turn on other people. It is more frightening than any scene with the monsters in the series before or since.

Favorite Quote:

Frankie (On the Monster Mashers): It’s like the Old Country

Elisa: Indeed, in the Old Country one angry villager could whip the rest of the villagers into a frenzy. I did not think this would happen in Brooklyn.

Danny: It hasn’t really happened yet. Stevie Brickwald has hated you guys a long time. That’s nothing new.

Frankie: Followers are new.

Danny: Besides, it can’t be against the law to be supernatural. A lot of people on the street are a little strange. If you started deporting all of them, Greenwich Village would be empty.

Howie: Still worse things have started with less.

7. Things That Go Bark In the Park-While amusement parks are often fun places to go, they can be pretty creepy places at night or when they are closed. I remember one summer 2000, when I worked at Six Flags-St. Louis and left after closing from the Warners Backlot to the crew exit to go home. The trip through the abandoned rides like the roller coasters, Colossus Ferris Wheel, and Sherwood Forest was pretty scary imagining someone coming out to jump me.  Gilden captures that fear factor of visiting a closed amusement park to 11, by revealing it to be a place of ghosts and “Hounds of Heck.”

Wonder Hill, a theme park owned by Stevie’s uncle Roland Hill is about to be opened.

The kids in Ms. Cosgrove’s class are invited to a special trip before the grand opening despite rumors that the amusement park is haunted.

The Monster Kids attend a séance, headed by Elisa, and discover that the park is indeed haunted by someone named Overton Hill, an ancestor of Roland and Stevie’s. When the class goes to the park, they discover props flying in the air, robots getting attacked, Stevie being kidnapped, and some mysterious creepy dogs called “The Hounds of Heck.” The kids have to rescue Stevie and find out why the park is cursed so they can break it before the park is opened.

Inside Jokes, References, and Trivia:

• The title is a play on the term, “things that go bump in the night” used to describe ghosts and other monstrous creatures.
• Elisa apparently has experience leading séances since she mentions that she has done so in Germany once.
• Roland Hill’s appearance as a man with rodential features and a pencil-thin mustache, not to mention the design of his theme park with a large golf ball-looking dome as the centerpiece is a coincidence and not meant to resemble any other famous theme park owner/animator/movie studio head, I’m certain. (End sarcasm.)
• Like before with Born to Howl, the Hounds of Heck, ghost dogs, are probably so named to make the book more kid-friendly and avoid controversy. However, there is a mistake about them: Danny says he never heard of real ones and only used the term for a Halloween costume he created for his dog, Harryhausen. However, in Born to Howl, Barbara created the costume for Harryhausen to earn her Girls’ Pathfinders Theatre Arts Merit Badge.
• Roland Hill must have a fondness for Celtic and Norse Mythology as well as Shakespeare. Many of the attractions are based on these things like Oberon’s Hall, Titania’s Shoppe, Stonehenge, Watling Street (which he says is based on a street the Romans built in England) Fairy’s Flight, Avalon, and Yggsdrail (the large tree in which the Asgard gods reside on top in Norse mythology).
• To calm the Hounds of Heck down Elisa commands “Gey avec hundt” which she says works on dogs in Germany. The closest meaning that I found appears to be “Obey, dog!” (If I am wrong, please let me know, German speakers)
• The Great Moments in Brooklyn History Show features historic events like the Walloons from Eastern France and Netherlands being the first European settlers in Brooklyn named Bruijkleen, the Battle of Long Island in the Revolutionary War, the Nassau the first steamboat to cross the East River, the first public library opening, water piped into Brooklyn for the first time, the launching of the Monitor one of the first ironclad fighting ships, and the opening of the Brooklyn Bridge.
• Once again Stevie’s illustrious family history is mentioned as Great Moments in Brooklyn History features robot duplicates of the Hills and Brickwald families, two of the oldest families in Brooklyn. One of them is a robot version of Stevie.
• One of the chapter titles is humorously titled “Stevie’s Comin’ ‘Round the Mountain When He Comes” as he’s kidnapped by the Hounds of Heck for being Overton Hill’s descendant. This is based on the old folk song, “She’s Comin’ ‘Round the Mountain When She Comes.” Another chapter called “If You Knew Heinrick, Like I Know Heinrick” is based on an old standard song called “If You Knew Susie, Like I Know Susie.”
• Overton Hill, Roland and Stevie’s ancestor is revealed to be a Revolutionary War veteran and money lender. He is cursed to haunt the theme park by a playwright named Heinrick Von Donk after Hill panned his play until he understands fun.
• Overton Hill is described by the Steins as a “toomler” a spirit that is supposed to be a merrymaker and make sure everybody has fun. (But since in life all he did was collected and count money, he considered only that fun and doesn’t quite get the concept. No wonder Danny describes him as a “terrible toomler.”)

Favorite Passage: Overton Hill attempts to understand how people can have fun, so he forces the Hounds of Heck to take the kids on a speedy trip through the theme park to ride the rides. However, since they move too fast the kids don’t have time to experience the rides. The rides also move too fast, becoming less fun and more dangerous.

This scene shows how insane Overton Hill has become in his years of haunting the area and how little he understands the con

cept of “fun.” It also shows the kids in real dangerous situations that only their cleverness, ability to reason with Hill, and their spiritual connections with Heinrick Von Donk can get them out of this situation.

Favorite Quote:

Howie: Hounds of Heck!

Danny: What? I just made that up so my dog, Harryhausen would have a costume for Halloween (Actually Barbara made the costume.)

Howie: Sorry old man. You may have invented them independently, but they really exist and there they are.

Danny: Where do they come from?

Howie: Heck, I suppose.

Frankie: More importantly, what do they want?

C.D.: Stevie Brickwald apparently (said with some satisfaction).

8. Yuckers!- This is probably my least favorite book in the series because there are long passages where not much happens including an overly long multi-chapter trip into the sewers. But this book does have a few interesting things to offer such as a couple of bits with a cute pink blob like creature, a pretty frightening moment with C.D. which I will explain later, and has a strong environmental message about keeping waters clean.

During a class assignment on studying mold on food, Stevie’s combines C.D’s stolen Fluid of Life with Yuckers! Cereal. The strange combination somehow creates, Yuckers a blob-like creature that changes its shape into other forms like a small pink dog. Yuckers the creature begins to inhabit the school’s sewer system and then is released to the rest of Brooklyn. The kids follow Yuckers to find out where it came from, how it was created, and whether they can destroy or release it.

Meanwhile there is a group of activists including Danny’s mother and Ms. Cosgrove who are trying to stop Sucrose Inc., creator of Yuckers! Cereal, from polluting Upalazy River something that seems to disturb Yuckers, the creature, as well.

Inside Jokes, References, and Trivia:

·         While Yuckers is the name of a cereal and the little pink creature, the term was previously said by Barbara to describe something as yucky or disgusting.

·         Ms. Cosgrove’s assignment is to show how mold grows on old food and how it is also used for penicillin and other positive uses.

·         Will the puns never cease in this series? The Upalazy River, is based on the phrase “going up the lazy river.” One of the chapters is “Yes Sewer, That’s My Baby” in reference to the old song, “Yes Sir, That’s My Baby.”

·         Somewhat unusually for a group of 9- and10-year-olds, Danny, Barbara and the Monster Kids don’t care for cereal that is filled with sugar like Yuckers, stretching credibility just a bit for kids of their age.

·         Sucrose Inc. is named for carbohydrates that break down into simple sugars in the body. The company is owned by Bill Spooner.

·         Mrs. Keegan and Ms. Cosgrove are part of an environmental group called “Nothing But Blue Skies,” in reference to the song “Blue Skies.” Considering the probable ages of Danny and Barbara’s parents, there is a good chance they were probably hippies in the sixties. Also Mrs. Keegan allows Barbara to participate in the protest, which she helps make signs.

·         If deprived of his Fluid of Life, C.D. gets vampire hiccups that cause him to change quickly from human to bat. He claims that he doesn’t really know what is inside it and his family gets it from Transylvania. (Contradicting other books where C.D. hints that the Fluid of Life is a substitute “for something else” but never comes right out and says what it is.)

·         Stevie puts ketchup on his neck to make Ms. Cosgrove think C.D. bit him to get him kicked out of school.

·         The school custodian is named Mr. Page and may know about the monsters’ identities. At the end of the book after Yuckers leaves, he says “One less monster to worry about” and compliments C.D.’s fangs.

·         Yuckers has a fondness for milk and often drinks or swims inside of it. It also swallows pollution making water cleaner.

·         A combination of the marbits (marshmallow bits) in Yuckers cereal, fertilizer, and Fluid of Life create the Yuckers creature

·         While traveling under the sewers, the kids travel all the way from the Steins’ home to C.D.’s neighborhood and are able to point out familiar sights through the manhole covers.

·         Another slogan that unintentionally gains relevance in modern day: Sucrose’s “Sugar Makes America Strong.”

Favorite Passages: While most of the book is rather dull, there is one almost disturbing passage: After Stevie has stolen C.D’s Fluid of Life for his school project, the young vampire panics. He gets vampire hiccups which changes him from his natural form to a bat really quickly and his fangs get longer. He also becomes more aggressive and fierce. This scene reminds us that despite C.D. and the others being nice monsters, they are still in fact monsters. At times if deprived of their ethics, morals, and physical limitations that keep them from attacking, they can be as potentially frightening and dangerous as the monsters of legend.

Favorite Quote: C.D.: I have run out of Fluid of Life! I had a full bottle this morning. A bottle always lasts me through the day. This bottle is empty!

Ms. Cosgrove: Stay calm, C.D.

C.D.: I must have some more Fluid of Life!

Ms. Cosgrove: Well this is an unusual situation. I understand that you need this…er, Fluid of Life. But I’m not sure I can just release you from class.

C.D.: Or I will be forced to revert to the habits of my ancestors. (Narration: Danny rubbed his neck and realized for the first time just how important Fluid of Life was to C.D. He also realized for the first time C.D. scared him.)

9. The Monster In Creeps Head Bay-This book brings in some new characters to the group, Ryan Webler, a budding journalist and Gilly Finn, a Show-tunes singing mermaid. It also begins a shift in the series’ tone from straight-up parody/tributes to horror in favor of including fantasy and science fiction tropes. This is probably why Gilden included a mermaid into the group instead of another monster like a witch, a zombie, or a mummy. Ryan and Gilly make marvelous additions to the group and show a different more whimsical side to the series that carries through the later books.

Just as Ryan and Gilly are introduced to P.S. 13, rumors begin that there is a sea serpent found in Creeps Head Bay, near Gilly’s home on Stuyvesant Marina. Gilly has the idea to “put on a show” to learn about and make people aware of the sea serpent’s existence So she and Danny look for “glitz” for the show. Meanwhile Ryan has a journalistic curiosity to study the serpent up close and Howie, C.D., Frankie, and Elisa have a monstrous curiosity to study Ryan to see whether he is a friend to be trusted with their secrets.

Inside jokes, references, and trivia

• Both new kids arrive make their presences and talents known instantly: Ryan has a Scribe Rotawing Laptop instead of a pencil and paper and Gilly arrives with a boombox playing music as she introduces herself.
• Unlike most mermaids, Gilly and her family have legs instead of fins. The signs that she is a mermaid are the fins on her wrists and ankles and greenish-colored skin.
• Gilly singing Broadway musicals and show tunes makes sense when you remember that in legends, mermaids and sirens sang to lure sailors to their deaths. In Gilly’s case, she often sings to build up people’s moods make them happier, stronger, or braver depending on the situation. She “always makes an entrance” by dancing and quoting song lyrics giving a chance for Gilden to display his obvious fascination with standard tunes. Among the songs she or her family quote are  “School Days,” “Trouble (Right Here in River City)” “I Believe in You”, “By the Sea, “Sittin’ On the Dock of the Bay,” and a song of her  own called “Save the Whales.”
• Ryan wants to be a journalist and novelist like Ernest Hemingway and John Steinbeck. He compares his experiences with the Monster Kids to Hemingway’s experience fighting in WWI, Steinbeck’s time living with the people on Cannery Row, and Mark Twain’s adventures prospecting for silver. He thinks his time with the monsters will lead to exciting adventures about which to write.
• Gilly lives on a houseboat on Stuyvesant Marina with her mother, Patty and her aunts, Maxine and Laverne, the Fabulous Finn Sisters, a singing trio. They are named for Patty, Maxine, and Laverne, the Andrews Sisters, a famous singing trio. She also appears to be the only member of the Monster Kids and their friends who are raised in a single parent household, since her father is nowhere to be found.
• Ryan’s father, Lance Webler is an interior designer for the new Buy ‘Em-Trade ‘Em-Get The Whole Set Building. The name of the building is a reference to the slogan for Topps’ Baseball Cards (and is similar to Pokemon’s “Gotta Catch ‘Em All” but pre-dates it by about 10 years.).
• A nearby sea captain, owner of the Stuyvesant Marina, and friend of Gilly’s is Long John Silverman. He also has a brother named Ohio Silverman (Get it, Hy-Yo Silver? The slogan from the Lone Ranger?) who owns the nearby Neptune Theatre.
• Quincy Clinton Ashcroft III is the primary antagonist for this book and the owner of the nearby Marina De la Deedah (a pun on the phrase “la-di-da”). There is a definite economic gap between the folks on Stuyvesant (who have motorboats and are more rugged and seaworthy) vs. the folks on Marina de la Deedah (who have sailboats and yachts and are richer and snobbier).
• Ryan often uses the phrase “-30-“ which is an old journalistic expression for the end of an article. (So the copyeditors and production team who did the layout would know where to cut the article.) Ryan uses “thirty” to signify the end of anything. Barbara repeats it by saying that it’s “thirty” for the end of dinner or “thirty” for the end of her favorite show. (“As far as Danny was concerned, thirty for Barbara didn’t come soon enough.”)
• Ms. Cosgrove hosts a debate on whether to save or destroy the sea serpent: Danny, Elisa, and Howie’s team argue for saving. Stevie and Angela argue for destroying. Gilly takes a neutral approach to studying it.
• Ryan once refers to sailing on the Veronica Lake in his former home of Michigan. The Veronica Lake is named for the beautiful 1940’s star of films like Sullivan’s Travels and This Gun For Hire and was known for her blond peek-a-boo hairstyle.
• There is a plot point that is never fully answered: At one point, Danny and Gilly are followed by two sinister characters that she sings to make them forget about them. It is never fully explained who these men are and why they are following them. (They were probably hired by Ashcroft but is never actually said).
• Among the highlights at Stuyvesant Marina are the Polynesian Paradise Market which sells seaside trinkets and “authentic-style” (read: fake) sea serpent collectibles and the Trojan Army and Navy Surplus Store owned by Gilly’s friends, Ulysses and Jason. Yes, the Ulysses and Jason from the Greek mythological stories, The Odyssey and Jason and the Argonauts respectively. Besides running a fine business which sells military supplies and memorabilia from other time periods, they also still have the winds that Aeolus gave Ulysses in the Odyssey (and his crew released sending them out of their way). The winds are named Fido, Trusty, Sport, and Baskerville and act like friendly active little puppies.
• In trying to get the Monster Kids to ‘fess up, Ryan says he doesn’t work for the Winker, a tabloid newspaper that writes fantastic stories about aliens, Elvis’ survival, and of course monsters.
• Howie once again shows an interest in old movies by mentioning Esther Williams’s movies, which feature people swimming in patterns to music.
• There is a legend of Captain Julius Filister, a Brooklyn pirate who’s ship sank taking possibly his treasure with him in Creeps Head Bay. We read more about it and Ashcroft’s obsession with it in the following book, Island of the Weird.

Favorite Passages: The scenes where Ryan and the Monster Kids and Danny and Gilly separate into their own adventures reveal Ryan and Gilly to be trusted members to the gang and fit right in.

In Ryan’s story, he takes the other Monsters on a rowing adventure to get a close-up of the sea serpent. This gives them a chance to wander the waters and to tell one another about their lives. Ryan in particular becomes a noted observer of his new friends’ talents and can be trusted to keep their secrets “off the record.”

In Gilly and Danny’s story, the playful mermaid takes him through her home of Stuyvesant Marina, filled with sea folk and eccentric characters. Most importantly she introduces him to Jason and Ulysses who prove to be particularly helpful in some of the later books. Gilly shows her enthusiasm and exuberance by introducing Danny to her friends and family and leading the idea of “putting on a show.”

Favorite Quotes: 1. Gilly (quoting from The Music Man): Friends, we got trouble right here in the Stuyvesant Marina. With a capital T and that rhymes with sea and that goes with serpent.

2. Danny: I guess the adventure is over.

Ryan: Yeah, that’s thirty all right.

10. How To Be a Vampire in One Easy Lesson- This is probably the last of the books in the Fifth Grade Monster series that goes for straight-up horror almost the end of an era. The later books more of focus on fantasy and science fiction with more elaborate and fantastic plots. It makes for a nice ending for that facet of the series opening a lot of the regular tropes that had been found up until then, such as the Monster Kids’ family backgrounds, Stevie’s fear and hatred of them, and the differences between how the monsters really are vs. how they are perceived on the screen.

At a charity showing of the old Bela Lugosi film Dracula, Stevie becomes interested in becoming a vampire, but not because he suddenly understands and likes the monsters. He wants to become a vampire so he can force people to bend to his will. C.D. and the others at first warn him that it is impossible, but when he won’t listen, C.D. reluctantly agrees. He and his family put him through some history and grooming lessons and they take him to meet The Count, as in The Count. Stevie thinks his plan is working but the Biteskys have other ideas.

While this book shows a nastier more mischievous side to the Monster Kids and some may question their behavior in playing an elaborate practical joke on Stevie. Their behavior should not be condoned but there are a few things to consider: The Monster Kids may be mature for 10-year-olds but they are still 10-year-olds. Kids often don’t act in mature ways all the time, especially when it comes to bullies and rivals. Plus, they have spent many books putting up with Stevie’s bullying, taunting, threats of physical violence, and pranks to get them kicked out of school. It is not a wonder that they play a prank on him, it’s a wonder that they didn’t do it sooner.

Inside Jokes, References, and Trivia

• The Count is the only one of the Famous Monsters that we get to meet as an actual character in the series. A running gag is when someone (usually Danny or Stevie) begin by calling him “Drac-“ C.D. or one of the Biteskys interrupt them by saying “He is the Count. We will say no more.” (Since Dracula is in the public domain, chances are this is meant to show the Bitesky’s respect to him rather than to get past any copyright restrictions). He doesn’t speak and his requests are often translated by Mr. Bitesky.
• The Count not speaking makes since when you think about it. He is described to resemble Max Schreck’s Count Orlock, the vampire in the 1920’s silent horror film, Nosferatu. Like a silent character, he wouldn’t speak!
• Van Helsing, is only referred to as The Professor and an enemy of The Count’s of whom the vampire still has nightmares. So Vampire Hunters are as scary to vampires as vampires are to the rest of us. It makes sense.
• Gilly’s at it again. The songs she sing in this book include “There’s No Business Like Show Business,” “Cool Clear Water,” “On A Clear Day I Can See Forever,” “For What It’s Worth,” and “You’ll Never Walk Alone,”
• The Count lives underneath the catacombs of an old movie theatre owned by a woman named Abby Carfax. (In the novel and movie, Dracula, The Count buys a building called Carfax Abbey). Even better Abby drives a van, she calls Helsing.
• Abby is showing the 1931 film of Dracula at her theatre to save it from being closed. The Monster Kids, except Gilly, refuse to go but C.D. asks Danny, Ryan, and Gilly to pay respects to The Count.
• Gilly mentions that most “mermaid movies generally are silly and not at all offensive.” This book was published in 1990, one year after the Little Mermaid came out and six years after Splash was released. (Gilly also bears a strong resemblance to Madison the mermaid in Splash played by Darryl Hannah.)
• A reformed Arthur Debarber, former founder of the Monster Mashers, makes a reappearance taking Stevie to the movies to show how good some monster movies are. (Stevie just wants the snacks.) We also see his friend, J. Manley Forest, Horrorifics member and publisher of Marvelous Movie Monsters Magazine again.
• A Pierard  illustration shows movie posters for The Hideous Sun Demon Vs. the Aztec Mummy and the infamous Plan 9 from Outer Space. (Apparently Carfax Palace Theatre only shows the “best” films.)
• Another inside reference provided by Pierard’s illustrations, Stevie and Danny are in C.D’s neighborhood on the corner of Murnau and Schreck. F.W. Murnau was the director of Nosferatu, one of the earliest (and scariest) film versions of Dracula starring Max Schreck. (Interestingly enough Max Schreck was one of the earliest known Method actors. He often went out at night, kept to himself, and kept his make up on when they weren’t filming leading to rumors for years that he really was a vampire. The creepy, but excellent movie Shadow of a Vampire takes that rumor literally.)
• To begin Stevie’s vampire training, Mr. Bitesky begins telling him of “the proud history of the Transylvanian people” and the various groups like Szeklers, Magyars, Wallachians, and Moldavians that didn’t like each other. He also speaks of leaders like Horia, Closca, Crisan, and of course Vlad Dracul, a Wallachian prince and war chieftain, his son Vlad who was the one who was said to be a vampire, and his son Radu the Handsome who was not.
• Again someone has trouble putting on a Bitesky-style tuxedo. In fact Stevie has so much trouble with it, that he has trouble taking it off and wears it for a few days straight.
• Ms. Cosgrove assigns her students to make oral reports on animals: Howie chooses bats, C.D. chooses wolves, Gilly chooses manatees, Danny chooses earthworms, and Ryan chooses sharks. (It is never said what Frankie and Elisa choose.)
• The Count makes a deal with Stevie: If he gets rid of the seepage and water underneath the theatre, then The Count will make Stevie a vampire. Of course Stevie makes the other kids get rid of the water.
• Yuckers The Creature makes a second appearance residing in the catacombs of the theater and the cause for the seepage. He can only be lured out by the taste of Mal-Tedds Milk Balls and Gilly’s singing which lures all manner of water and water creatures.
• In response to Ryan’s request for an interview, The Count hands him a press release which says: “Greetings and Felicitations, The Count, a real Transylvanian count, has come from his native land to seek freedom and adventure in the United States of America. He is delighted to be staying in Brooklyn, which he says reminds him of certain parts of the Old Country. The Count expects to make his home here for many years to come. For further information, please contact Abby Carfax, at the Carfax Palace Theater, Brooklyn. Thank you for your interest.”
• Stevie believing himself to be a vampire, called Baron Stevie Von Brickwald, practices his mesmerizing powers at the Horrorifics meeting. The Horrorifics shout out science fiction references like “42” (from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy) and “Slap Him in Jell-O.” (from Doctor Who, maybe?) Gilly describes it as “Inside jokes. They are only fun if you are inside.”
• When Stevie practices his mesmerizing powers, The Horrorifics quote various lines from the 1931 Dracula movie like “I am loyal to you, master loyal!” “Children of the night what music they make.” (Which C.D. quoted in M is for Monster) and “Flies! I must have flies!”
• Once and for all, this book shows that Monsters are born not made. C.D. and his friends and their families are born the way they are and were not bitten or transformed.

Favorite Passages: The appearances of The Count are really fascinating. The Biteskys treat him as a Family Head or a Mafia Don, the way they dress elaborately with emblems and banners, behave very mannerly, and treat him like royalty. While scary and intimidating-looking, The Count is shown to be rather polite with people, has a very deep friendship with Abby Carfax probably because she protects him in the catacombs, and hands Ryan a press release in lieu of a sit-down interview. Suggesting like the rest of the Biteskys, he is rather nice and friendly, if often silent and intimidating.

It is also interesting because The Count is the only one of his contemporaries like Frankenstein’s Monster and the Wolf-Man that we actually meet, suggesting that the others are long-dead. It’s kind of sad when you think about it, like an older celebrity in their late 90’s or approaching 100 whose contemporaries and peers have died before him.

Favorite Quote: Stevie (after finding out that he has not been turned into a vampire): You got me into this, bat-breath. If your relatives were any good at teaching, I’d be a vampire now.

C.D.: I think not. Before we began, I told you that you are a vampire or not. Howie was right. It is like having a red hair and freckles!

11. Island of the Weird-This is the book that starts the shift in tone and style in Fifth Grade Monsters, having more fantastic and elaborate plots that focus more on fantasy and science fiction rather than the earlier simpler plots that focus on horror. There is nothing wrong with that and these later books are just well-written and clever as the originals, but as often when tone and style changes, something gets lost along the way. There is a loss of simplicity and intimacy with the characters. Also the allegorical subtexts which are so fascinating in the original books in the series are minimized or abandoned all together.

Ms. Cosgrove assigns her students to study plants and other creatures in their natural habitats. So Danny, Frankie, Elisa, Ryan, and Gilly study Creeps Head Bay. While investigating the kids discover what may be a sunken ship so they pick up a “Jennifer motor” from Jason and Ulysses. Unfortunately, things don’t go quite as planned.

After Gilly sings, the “Jennifer motor” explodes sending the kids in a whirlpool that takes them right to the Brooklyn Triangle and the mysterious land of Ilium Dale. In exchange for helping  the Ilium Dale’s close their force field, they will help lead the kids home.

Another difficulty with this shift in the series’ tone and style is because the cast is larger, sometimes one or two of the characters miss out on the fun. This time the unfortunate

recipients are Howie and C.D. Howie is studying “the stars with his family in the raw.” (They’re werewolves, it’s not as weird as it sounds.) C.D. is studying the scarab beetles in the catacombs of his home. Another character who gets short shrift in the later books is Barbara. For a strong introduction of going from being an enemy to a friend of the monsters, she is sadly underused in the last few books. Probably because being younger and in a different grade, it’s hard to shoehorn her in plots that begin with class assignments. She only emerges as a major character in Troll Patrol and The Secret of Dinosaur Bog.

Inside jokes, references, and trivia

• Apparently no one told the cover illustrator that Howie and C.D. weren’t in the book very much, because the cover clearly displays the duo looking out underwater. Not only that but the Kids are inside a submarine. The kids do not ride a submarine at any point in the book.
• In the beginning Frankie and Elisa are playing their own variation of Cat’s Cradle. Instead of using rubber bands or string, they use waves of electricity from their fingers.
• We see the return of Quincy Clinton Ashcroft III who is still obsessed with Captain Julius Filister’s sunken ship and treasure claiming to have finally found it, selling pieces of the ship for a price. Ryan buys one to investigate whether it’s real or not.
• We also see the return of Jason and Ulysses and their wind-pets. Ulysses at one point taunts a bored Jason with “If you will lament again about your lot as a merchant, I will plug my ears with wax and not listen.” In the story of The Odyssey, Ulysses plugged his ears with wax so he wouldn’t listen to the song of  The Sirens and go safely past them.
• Ulysses and Jason blame each other for the sinking of The Titanic and the loss of the Flying Dutchman. Apparently, they have been saving sinking or lost ships for thousands of years. They are also pretty tight with Captain Nemo of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea and taught him how to build a submarine. In fact the motor that Ulysses and Jason offer the kids once belonged to Captain Nemo.
• Gilly discovers a song called “Jennifer” that the Heroes say came from the lost continent of Atlantis. Atlantis, according to Jason, was the foremost inventor of things: food processors, chewing gun, experimental movies, and the English language. Their best inventor was Jennifer who created a motor named for her to be used for sea travel. Possibly she was named for the early “Jenny” planes.
• Much of the items in Atlantis are run by oricalcum which was a metal once known as the strongest metal but is now non-existent. Oricalcum may have been found in sunken boats and stone disks.
• Instead of blue skies, there is a purple sky that is under a force field when the kids land. Ilium Dale (possibly named for Robin Hood’s sidekick Alan-A-Dale) is not actually Atlantis, but a suburb of Atlantis that went adrift when the rest of it sunk. It is a home for shipwrecked survivors and there are people from many different time periods living in Ilium Dale.
• Ilium Dale apparently spent “some time off the coast of Bermuda,” so they are responsible for the disappearances in the Bermuda Triangle.
• The leader of Ilium Dale is First Owner Hellespont. Hellespont is named for a waterway in Northwestern Turkey which joins Europe and Asia.
• Besides creating the Jennifer motor, Jennifer also created oxygen T-Shirts which allowed her and her friends to explore the ocean. Danny, Ryan, Frankie, and Elisa use them to go underwater and are able to keep them afterwards.
• To get to the Central Mountain which houses the control panel for the force field, the kids ride three stone horses. Frankie, Elisa, and Gilly ride solo and Danny and Ryan ride one together.
• Even though the kids aren’t able to lift the central cable, they discover a potential way to turn off the force field so the Ilium Dalians can travel freely. (Perhaps if the series had continued we would have seen a return of the Ilium Dalians.)

Favorite Passage: While Ilium Dale is a fascinating setting, the most memorable part of this book is when Danny and the others first encounter the strange seas which exist out of time and space. Because of this oddity, they encounter various characters and ships from the past and future, everything from Noah’s Ark (filled with animals) to a ship from the future. They also encounter some fictional and legendary seagoing characters like the crew of the Flying Dutchman, Davy Jones, Captain Ahab searching for Moby Dick and Alice (from Wonderland) swimming in the pool of tears looking for The Mouse.

This experience meeting fictional characters carries a very meta-conversation in which they wonder if they are fictional as well, a concept that is not often explored in YA novels.  (Though adult novels like the Thursday Next series and Thomas Pynchon’s works often have fun with it.)

Favorite Quotes: Ryan: It’s Ahab battling Moby Dick. I saw the old movie.

Danny: You saw the movie. Elisa read about the Flying Dutchman in a book. If all this stuff is just make believe what is it doing in Creeps Head Bay?

Frankie: Maybe we are make-believe also. (Narration: Danny waited for him to smile, but Frankie did not.)

12. Werewolf Come Home- This book could almost be considered a direct sequel to Born to Howl, because it covers an almost parallel situation. In the previous book, Howie longed to be a human boy, now in this book he is afflicted with an illness that turns him into a wolf and unable to change back.

The Kids chase after their transformed wolfish friend with the help of Zelda Bella AKA Mother Scary, the witch who helped them in Born to Howl and they aided in Monster Mashers. While she has problems of her own with some overly helpful little creatures called the Familiaides who seem to turn her house inside out and in reverse.

There are fantastic situations abound particularly in Zelda Bella’s home and this book fits in with the more fanciful tone of the later books in the series by the magic of Zelda Bella and the Familiaides and Howie practically being cursed with his wolf form.

Inside jokes, references, and trivia

• The cover illustrators are at it again. They put Frankie and Elisa in the center of the action when they are only in the beginning and end working on a secret invention for Mother Scary’s Matinee’s Friday Night Special.
• The familiaides are named for familiars, witches’ servants and sometimes pets. They serve the same purpose for Zelda Bella at first. Howie ordered them through a mail-order service for her and they are described as a “Pacman creature or a happy face with thin arms and legs. This face had round eyes like gummed loose  reinforcements and a thin slash of a smile.” (For those who didn’t grow up in the ’80’s, Pacman was a yellow faced-video game creature that ate ghosts to get points. There was also a Ms. Pacman.)
• Howie’s parents are in Connecticut studying the moon on Mt. Palomine. He is staying with the Keegans overnight.
• Zelda Bella makes a soup while chanting the “Double Double Toil Trouble” lines from Shakespeare’s Macbeth freaking out both Danny and Howie (especially when she gets to the line about “tongue of dog.”). However, Zelda Bella is only joking and making vegetable soup.
• The first symptoms of Howie’s transformation are feeling extremely overheated and his hair growing much longer and shaggier.
• Oddly enough the kids refuse to cut school to look for Howie because they had never done it before and are afraid of getting in trouble. But they figure as long as they can hear Howie’s howling, that he will be fine until after school. (Admirable in a “staying in school” sense but not so much in an “our friend’s in trouble and we have to help him” sense.) 
• While Howie’s on the prowl, the kids in school spread rumors about a monster. The rumors get bigger until they believe that Godzilla is attacking the school. When Howie the Wolf emerges with his skateboard some kids are disappointed. (“They had been expecting Godzilla.”)
• As shown with the skateboard, Howie shows some human traits. He goes directly to the Talbot Arms, to his home. He recognizes his friends even though he can’t communicate with them. He also still has human eyes and back teeth.
• This Reader hopes that the Wolfners have a special family doctor because this book illustrates the difficulty of a werewolf going to the doctor. The human doctor, Dr. Birnberg refuses to treat him because he’s a dog. The veterinarian, Dr. Wilma, just thinks that he’s a healthy dog or wolf (“or whatever” noting his human characteristics)  but doesn’t know how to treat his werewolf problems.
• Zelda Bella reveals that Howie has the mongrels, a common childhood werewolf illness like the chicken pox and more than likely the Familiaides were carriers of the disease. She also mentions the reason the Familiaides are acting so crazy is because her cauldron has residue from old spells that affected them.
• To cure the Mongrels early, Zelda Bella wants to give Howie garlic. Rather than objecting because of his own aversion to garlic, C.D. takes one for the team and agrees to let her use it if it means curing his friend.
• Zelda Bella’s kitchen comes complete with various herbs, potions, and what she describes as “cookbooks” that are written in Witch.
• Zelda Bella drives a 1956 Broom a futuristic-looking small black car that goes so fast it appears to be flying (Take that Nimbus, 2000!) She also has a handbag, called Cthulhu-style named for the Dark God in H.P. Lovecraft’s shared universe.
• Howie’s father is named Lon, for Lon Chaney Jr. the man who played Larry Talbot/The Werewolf in The Wolf Man.
• Frankie and Elisa’s secret invention is an organ which emits illusions of fireworks and sparklers and impress the Familiaides.

Favorite Passage: The tour through Zelda Bella’s redesigned home is truly bizarre and almost trippy how it lays upside down and inside out. The kids walk through walls and end up in different rooms. Corridors and stairwells seem endless and lighthouses emerge to lead them astray to where they are going.

The style seems very reminiscent of the Winchester Mystery House with its endless corridors, stairs that go nowhere and other features. (Also recalled in the Stephen King miniseries, Rose Red  with a room in which the furnishings hang upside down, a room with a mirrored library, and another room which is out of perspective that seems to get smaller. However Werewolf Come Home pre-dates Rose Red, so Winchester Mystery House is probably the main inspiration.)

Favorite Quote

Danny: Howie and C.D. don’t like garlic. It makes them nervous and they change into their animal forms.

Zelda Bella: Right you are, kid. But the garlic won’t bother Howie. He’s already in his animal form. I don’t know what we’re going to do about C.D.

C.D.: Howie is my friend. If there is really no other way to cure him, you may proceed.

Zelda Bella: No other way.

C.D.: I will be fine. (Narration: C.D. took a big drink of Fluid of Life and wrapped himself tightly in his cape.)

Ryan: You’re a great guy.

Gilly: Nothing fishy about you.

13. Monster Boy-This book in the series carries many science-fiction tropes including parallel universes, superheroes, and supervillains. Also, Danny gets a taste of “seeing how the other half lives”: when he has the powers of all of his friends.

In a trip to The Museum of Strange Sciences and Inventions, so Frankie can promote his “Trash Can’t” which sends garbage into another dimension, Danny and Stevie get into a fight after Stevie steals Frankie’s prototype. Unfortunately, the fight accidentally turns on “the Trash Can’t” and sends the two enemies to an alternate Brooklyn.

In this descriptive parallel world, Danny’s friends are normal kids, Stevie is an evil supercientist genius, and above all Danny has his friend’s abilities: C.D.’s ability to fly, the Steins’ ability to shoot electricity, and Howie’s ability to turn into a wolf. (Since Ryan and Gilly were new, they either have yet to attend P.S. 13 or do not exist in this universe). Danny has to use his new superpowers to fight Stevie who is using his abilities to destroy P.S. 13 and the rest of Brooklyn. Besides that Danny has to figure out how he got his abilities and how do he and Stevie return to their Brooklyn before Stevie destroys everything.

Inside jokes, references, and trivia

• Danny and his father try to build a perpetual motion machine, a puzzle that has challenged scientists and inventors for years. Theirs doesn’t even last a minute before it breaks down. Frankie even says it’s impossible.
• The Museum of Strange Sciences and Inventions has an emerald green interior which makes it look like the Emerald City in The Wizard of OZ. The founder, Mr. Wells (named for H.G. Wells, author of The Time Machine and War of the Worlds) bears a strong resemblance to Frank Morgan who played the Wizard in the 1939 film.
• The sound of a violin string being plucked and a feeling of unbearable tension are what herald Danny’s arrival in Alternate-Brooklyn and his return to the real Brooklyn.
• The teacher in Alternate-Brooklyn P.S. 13’s Fifth Grade class is Mrs. Bradley, the substitute teacher from Z is for Zombie.
• In Alternate-Brooklyn Marla Willaby is the class genius, C.D. dresses in more casual clothes-jeans and a T-Shirt, and Frankie is not a scientific genius. Most importantly none of the Monster Kids are monsters.
• In a Harsher in Hindsight moment police guard the school dressed in riot gear. Danny’s question “Was this universe so violent that policemen were needed to guard schools?” seems less odd now in 2017, in the wake of school and workplace mass shootings.
• Unlike the Monster Kids in real Brooklyn, everyone knows that Danny has monster abilities. In fact he is named “Monster Boy” and is treated like a superhero.
• In Alternate-Brooklyn, Danny has a younger brother named Barney, instead of a sister, Barbara. But Barney has Barbara’s inquisitive sometimes pesky personality alright.
• Mrs. Bradley warns Danny not to expect special treatment. Danny did not expect such as thing but thinks Mrs. Bradley expects it being his teacher (More grown-up logic: “Teachers were so weird. Adults were so weird. I’m cold, so you put on a sweater.”)
• To prove to Danny’s friends that Alternate-Danny and Alternate-Stevie are from a parallel universe, they show them a fifteen cent piece with John Adams’ face.
• The Alternate-Brooklyn version of the Museum of Strange Inventions and Sciences is owned by Mr. Verne (named for the author 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea and Journey to the Center of the Earth.) Stevie began to be a super scientist after fooling with an invention called “Kreb’s Brain Booster.”
• Danny’s parents know about his monster abilities in Alternate-Brooklyn and know he was not born with them. He was transformed during a family vacation at the LionelHamptons (named for the bandleader, Lionel Hampton.)
• At the LionelHamptons, Danny meets the beings who transformed him into a monster: None other than Mrs. Stein, Mr. Bitesky, and Mrs. Wolfner who call themselves “The Monster Masters.” (Perhaps an alternate version of the Monster Mashers?) They conferred their powers to him so he can combat evil.
• Stevie’s secret hideout is called Putt Mania, a miniature golf course. Besides being in an alternate universe, Stevie still has his Real World intelligence when he can’t figure out what his Alternate versions’ inventions are called or what they do. However, one makes him grow ala Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.

Favorite Passage: The many moments where Danny experiences his friend’s powers are pretty interesting. In many of the books preceding, Danny wondered what it would be like to have his friends’ abilities. Now he has C.D’s ability to fly, the Steins’ ability to shoot electricity, and Howie’s ability to transform into a wolf. However, he begins to understand his friends’ limitations. For example, after using Howie’s werewolf strength, Danny is exhausted and  understands why Howie sleeps after transforming. He also has the aversion to garlic which makes him ill.

Above all Danny learns with “these great powers come great responsibility” especially when everyone knows about them. Danny quickly grows tired of fighting and cleaning up after Stevie Brickwald’s attacks. He can’t wait to go home and be a regular human kid again.

Favorite Quote

Danny: Are you the ones who gave me my powers? (The Monster Masters nod) Why me?

Mr. Bitesky: The process of choosing is complex. We needed someone who would be good at fighting evil.

Mrs. Wolfner: We don’t fight evil ourselves.

Mrs. Stein: We only confer powers.

Danny: Can you send me and Stevie back to our own universe?

Mrs. Stein: A very good question.

Danny: If you guys can’t do it, can you make Stevie help me do it?

Mrs. Wolfner: As we said, we don’t fight evil ourselves. That’s your job.

Danny: If I have to stay, my life would be a lot easier if Stevie had his mind deflated back to its normal level. Do you know how to do that?

Mr. Bitesky: We are not responsible for Stevie Brickwald’s condition and so we cannot change it.

Mrs. Wolfner: We don’t fight evil ourselves.

Danny (sarcastically): I know, you only confer powers.

14. Troll Patrol-This book features a more fantasy plot and characters than the previous books including trolls, dwarves, and a magical forest with fairy tale spells.

To promote good will between humans and monsters and to buy a video tape recorder for the Horrorifics, Arthur Debarber and J. Manley Forest open “Camp Horrorific,” in which the Monster Kids (save Howie) are counselors and the human kids are campers in a place called Under Wood.  

The gang seems to settle for an interesting summer of arts, crafts, boating, swimming, and scary stories. However weird things start to happen such as campers’ items start to go missing and there is Andahseven, a strange camper who claims to be from Sweden. But he has a gravelly voice and what appears to be a beard. They also start to hear strange growling sounds and an odd putrid smell around the Long Island woods.

Danny and his friends stumble on a group of trolls that invade the camp and curse its residents. They have to find a way to stop the curse and defeat the trolls with the help of their new friend, Andahseven who is revealed to be a dwarf.

Inside jokes, references, and trivia

• It’s odd that Howie would miss out on this story since he is the one who came up with the idea of a summer camp to promote monster goodwill after seeing the movie If  It Howls Like a Wolf. (A movie he loves because it portrays the werewolf as a hero.) Instead he is spending the summer with his parents at a werewolf convention.
• Besides Forest and Debarber, the camp is also staffed by Zelda Bella who is the camp cook (and immediately goes into a duet of “Summertime” with Gilly) and Jason and Ulysses who are the boating and swimming counselors.
• Elisa is the counselor of the Frankenstein Monster Girls cabin (which Barbara is a camper). Frankie is the counselor for the Frankenstein Monster Boys Cabin (which Ryan is a camper). Gilly is the counselor for the Mermaid Cabin. C.D. is the counselor for the Vampire Cabin (which Danny and Andahseven are campers).
• Danny’s fellow campers are named Jack, Joe, and Harold. At first they think the monster theme is just that, a theme until their encounters with C.D. and the rest of the camp convince them otherwise. Another camper is named Humbert Battaglia who is missing coins.
• At one point Danny reads Space Cadet by Robert Heinlein which deals with a group of kids chosen to be astronauts and having adventures in space.
• After Andahseven falls overboard from Jason and Ulysses’ boat, Gilly rescues him. Throughout the rest of the book, he continuously follows and pesters Gilly like a loyal servant much to her chagrin.
• A terrible odor that smells like skunk, burning rubber, and rotten eggs precedes the arrival of trolls. C.D. explains that he and his family were on a picnic in the Schultzwald when they caught the smell of trolls. They immediately returned home.
• Gilden took a cue from Tolkien (and other legends as well) when Andahseven reveals that trolls turn to stone during the day. Also, they steal certain things because they “like shiny stuff” and are unaware of monetary value.
• In lieu of ghost stories, Forest reads to the campers from Pretty Good Wonder Tales pulp magazine. One story he reads is called “In the Forest of Enchantment” written by a Commander R.A. McDonald, Ret. (I wonder if the R. stands for Ronald.)
• Frankie builds a troll motel to trap the trolls. He pours some yellow substance that has the consistency of pancake batter and makes a small thick puddle made from ingredients in Zelda Bella’s kitchen near the camp. He hopes to trap the trolls in it until morning.
• Besides Andahseven, the campers meet Gnorble, another dwarf who is Andahseven’s guardian. Later Danny and the others visit the dwarves’ underground home which has several gems and buildings. (However the book says that dwarves are terrible tour guides only using general terms for everything such as “the building,” “the dwarf,” etc. instead or proper names.)
• Barbara and Humbert compare the dwarves to the Smurfs, little blue creatures that were created by Peyo and were popular in the ‘80’s. Gilly also compares them to Snow White and the Seven Dwarves which Andahseven says is a good movie.
• There are only three trolls and they have the names Pah, Con and Nah. (Get it? Pah-troll, Con-troll, and Nah-tu-roll? More pun-tastic fun from Mr. Gilden.)
• When the trolls capture the kids, Gilly pulls a “Br’er Rabbit.” (A prank from the stories by Joel Chandler Harris and the Disney movie, Song of the South. Br’er Rabbit tells his enemies not to throw him in the briar patch which is what they do. Of course since Br’er Rabbit was born and raised in the briar patch, he gets clean away.) In this variation, Gilly tells the trolls not to throw her and her friends into the Gojumpinthe Lake. (Go Jump in the Lake, oh, Mr. Gilden you’re a wonder.) They do and Gilly and the rest swim to safety.
• The camp is cursed in a style reminiscent of Sleeping Beauty when they are made to sleep and thorns surround the camp (courtesy of the trolls’ friends, goblins). They realize that like the story, the first person to be made to fall asleep in this case J. Manley Forest must be awakened before the others. Rather than kissing him, Elisa waves a copy  of Wonder Tales magazine under his nose. His true love of pulp magazines awakens him.
• When the Trolls finally are trapped by the troll motel and turn to stone, the Steins consider making them lawn jockeys in front of the Stein home.

Favorite Passage: Debarber takes the kids on a nature hike through the woods and this is where the really magical fantasy stuff happens. Many of the tropes in fairy stories are present. Gilly and C.D. dance inside a fairy ring according to their own personal styles. (Gilly dances more frantically like a Broadway tap dancer and C.D.’s movements are more elegant and sophisticated like a waltz.) Their friends help them jump out of the ring so they don’t get trapped to dance forever.

Another moment Debarber and the kids get hopelessly lost and follow what they believe is a light from camp but is in reality a will o’ the wisp, a fairy light that is meant to confuse travelers on their way and get them more lost. These passages show that fairies, trolls, and other fantasy creatures aren’t any different sometimes from monsters and can be sinister in their own way.

Favorite Quotes

1. Gilly: Are you a troll?

 Andahseven: No way, I’m Swedish.

Danny: Swedes your age don’t need to shave.

2. Elisa (after seeing J. Manley Forest under a sleep spell): “Sleeping Beauty” says that the princess was awakened by love’s first kiss.

Ryan: Any volunteers for kissing Mr. Forest?

Gilly: Not I.

Elisa: Me also.

C.D.  So much for brave sacrifice.

15. The Secret of Dinosaur Bog
- This is how the series ends, not with a bang but with a…..really confusing plot. It’s almost as though Gilden was aware that the series was going to end and stuffed as many tropes as he possibly could: curses, ghosts, dinosaurs, time travel, and aliens in case he wouldn’t get another chance for Danny and his friends to experience them.

Danny’s Grandpa David Keegan shows Danny a strange statue that had been in the family for decades. The statue is of a dinosaur and it has a detachable eye called the Eye of Brooklyn. Once the Eye of Brooklyn is removed from the statue bad luck, curses, and weird things start to happen. Ghostly dinosaurs appear and move around Danny’s room at night. Fossilized dinosaurs chase them around the Brooklyn Museum of Natural History, and Dinosaur Bog, a popular site is being drained for a housing development. The worst luck of all is Stevie Brickwald appears, bags in hand saying that his parents were on vacation and insisting that Danny said that agreed to let him stay with him.

Things get even weirder when Danny, Howie, and Elisa observe a photograph of Danny’s grandfather and great-grandfather posing in the 19-teens and the trio are transported through time to meet Grandpa Keegan as a boy. To get to their own time, the trio, David, and David’s friend Jacob must return the Eye of Brooklyn to Dinosaur Bog, a place that is inhabited by the Korb, pastel colored reptilian creatures from another world.

Inside Jokes, References, and Trivia

• Even though the series has a fictitious version of Famous Monsters in J. Manley Forest’s Marvelous Movie Monsters, the cover of The Secret of Dinosaur Bog shows a copy of the real Famous Monsters magazine with Frankenstein’s Monster as the cover model. So in this universe, the real Forest J. Ackerman may exist alongside the fictional J. Manley Forest.
• Instead of Girl’s Pathfinders, Barbara is now taking ballet lessons. As before with the Pathfinders, she appears to take her lessons very seriously practicing her positions and knowing all the French terms for them and her costume. She has also decorated her room with ballet posters and costumes. (It never says why she switches from Pathfinders to ballet. It could be like most kids she lost interest in the former, or it could be the incidents in Born to Howl and Troll Patrol scared her enough to prevent her from going camping ever again.)
• Gramps Keegan tells Danny and Barbara that he saved his money in the Great Depression by not buying stocks and kept his money in a big bank to wait it out. That’s why he’s so wealthy now. (Later on we find this was based on a tip from a time traveling Danny who warned him about the Depression.)
• The Keegan attic contains old items like back issues of Colliers and Liberty magazines, a pop top from Moxie’s soft drink, a slide rule, and sheet music of songs like “The Sidewalks of New York,” “Fascinating Rhythm,” “By the Light of the Silvery Moon,” “Lida Rose,” and “Alexander’s Ragtime Band.” Of course Gilly is interested in the sheet music and starts singing some of the songs.
• After the Eye of Brooklyn is removed from its socket, the first sign of bad luck is the arrival of Stevie Brickwald, bags in tow, ready to spend the weekend with Danny. Besides rudely entering the house and hogging Danny’s bed, Stevie for the first time shows very misogynistic tendencies by threatening to punch Elisa after she argues with him. (Before he never threatened her personally just included her in the group with the other monsters. This is the first time he singles her out specifically.)
• By far this book has the lowest count of kids going on the adventure: Danny, Howie, and Elisa, only three. Explanations are not given for the absence of the others but given that it’s a weekend, many are probably at their own houses doing their own things. No explanation probably would be necessary.
• Elisa suggests that returning the Eye to the dinosaur’s socket will restore the balance of bad luck. Howie compliments her by saying that’s something Frankie would have thought up. For the first time, Elisa shows some competitiveness with (and perhaps some envy of) her brother by saying, “You must give me some credit. I have not been Frankie’s sister for all these years without learning something of science.”
• Judging by the clothing styles and the fact that there are more horses than automobiles, Gramps Keegan was probably a boy in the 19-teens Brooklyn which makes him probably in his 80’s in the present. (He could have fathered Mr. Keegan at an older age perhaps in his 40’s or so.)
• Danny’s great-grandfather, his grandfather David’s father is named Thaddeus. Also they encounter Stevie Brickwald’s equally bullying grandfather, Theodore Brickwald (“Brickwalds Bullying Keegans For Hundreds of Years,” like Tannens to McFlys.)
• Once again the idea of comparing the Monster Kids to immigrants emerges when Theodore Brickwald taunts them for “being foreigners.” (David explains “A foreigner is somebody who’s been in the United States less than a week. Anybody who’s been here more than a month generally considers himself a native.”)
• Jacob is apparently Theodore Brickwald’s cousin therefore also a distant ancestor of Stevie’s but it is not stated whether his last name is Brickwald, Hill, or neither. (While he’s rude, he is also nicer than Stevie and Theodore and still a friend of David’s in old age. So he’s probably a Hill or neither rather than a Brickwald).
• Theodore appeared on Jacob’s doorstep in the past the same way Stevie did in the present suggesting the exact same thing is happening then that is happening in the present.
• The book is filled with early 19-teens slang such as “Nertz” for “Nuts” or “No way,” “Screwy” for “crazy,” and “the cat’s pajamas” for “the best.”
• Howie once again shows off his athletic skills by batting a baseball high in the air (Not bad for someone who probably is more familiar with playing Cricket rather than American Baseball).
• Jacob who was once a good marble player has been steadily losing. Could it be because of his new aggie which resembles the Eye of Brooklyn?
• Jacob has a secret place on the edge of Dinosaur Bog where he found the statue and removed the Eye not recognizing its importance.
• David and Jacob force Danny, Howie, and Elisa to tell them the whole truth about themselves. First they show them a ballpoint pen and Howie’s Walkman to prove they are from the future. After Howie reveals his strong sense of smell, they reveal everything about Danny’s friends including that Howie’s a werewolf and Elisa’s a Frankenstein’s Monster. So now two generations of Keegans know the truth about Danny’s friends.
• The leader of the Korb is a Tyrannosaurus Rex named Nemo and he states that the Eye of Brooklyn created Dinosaur Bog to protect the Korb from prying eyes.
• This is the second time that the kids have returned from a long adventure only to find that little time has passed. The first was in Island of the Weird when Mrs. Finn tells them they were only gone for an hour. This time Stevie says they have only been gone for a few minutes. You think they would be used to this by now.
• Mr. and Mrs. Brickwald return for Stevie without realizing that they ever went anywhere. We also learn Stevie’s mother’s name is Marge.
• Perhaps with the science fiction and fantasy bent, had the series continued we may have seen Andahseven from Troll Patrol enter P.S. 13 as an exchange student from Sweden and/or perhaps the arrival of an alien student from another planet.

Favorite Passage: The kids arrival in early Brooklyn is quite hilarious with interesting little touches. Danny explains his, Howie, and Elisa’s modern clothes such as blue jeans, t-shirts (Howie’s says “Born to Howl” of course the title of the second book in the series), and Elisa’s leg warmers as saying they are from California.

They see horse-drawn carriages outnumbering the black automobiles. The smell of horse-leavings and automobile exhaust overwhelms the modern kids. (Anyone who had ever stood in line at Six Flags-St. Louis’ Moon Car track with the old fashioned automobiles or had been to an antique car show will recognize that smell. My sister hates the Moon Cars for that reason). The description is quite memorable in showing the kids’ culture shock of being in a different time period.

Favorite Quotes

1. Howie (observing the setting around him): It’s all in color!

Elisa: Of course.

Narration: It was all very well for Elisa to remain cool, but Danny had been thinking the exact same thing. After all history lived for him mainly through TV, movies, and books. Most pictures he’d seen of eras before he was born-moving or still-had been in black and white. He knew that the world had always been in color, just as he knew Gramps had once been a little boy. He just had trouble believing it.

(Didn’t we all think this at one time, I mean really? I know I did)

2. Danny: The Korb are safe.

Gramps: What? Of sure, I told you everything would be all right, didn’t I?

Danny: Do you remember anything else?

Gramps: Nothing I’d care to talk about at the moment. You kids’ll have to trust me.

Narration: Danny and his friends nodded. They were willing to go along. Trusting Gramps had been interesting so far.

(The final words in a fine wonderful series!)